Named after a character in Entourage who had a romantic fling with James Woods, this dating site promises "an affair to remember" or your money back.
(All $249 of your 'guarantee package price' if you don't get laid by a fellow reprobate within three months).
"Life is short. Have an affair." That's their motto.
I have a better idea. How about NOT?
Call me a nutbag but I think they missed the whole point of marriage (and shall I venture to say, even an affair)?
Bear with me.
Never one to judge another's moral disposition, (after all, one person's paradise is another's ticket to hell), there is something inherently illogical regarding the founder's argument that makes, even a liberal like me, pause mid-air, squint my eyes, raise one eyebrow Scooby-doo style and say:
"Whoa!... wait just a doggone minute there buster!"
To which the founder replies:
"Infidelity is a fact of life... [we] provide a safe and successful platform for those who have decided to proceed down this path."
Safe from what? The dangers of VD? (As if there's any guarantee)
Or safe that you won't get caught by your wife or husband because everyone is in the same boat with just as much to lose as you?
Successful? If you think having an affair with a willing partner who signed up to have one is successful then you've got another thing coming (no pun intended).
Any jackass can shoot partridge in a cage.
Here's what I don't get.
The men I interviewed for my book claimed that the best part of dating was the chase. So much so, that most of them lost interest in a woman who gave it up too early, even if they liked them a whole lot before the naked dance party.
This held so true across the board that hard core hunters (a.k.a. players) told me they never bother putting themselves in the 'intimate' category of a dating profile, because they prefer to chase nice girls - it poses a greater challenge.
As a result of this psychosis, they put themselves in the "looking for long-term" category even when they have no intention of settling down with anyone. And women players (believe me, they're out there) do the same.
It's pretty yucky but you can usually weed them out (trust me I know - I learned the hard way).
But if the chase is not the point, then what is?
Getting away with something?
That's so Junior High.
Variety?
If you want variety, tell your partner you want an open marriage or you want to be single. Then you can have all the variety you want. You BOTH can.
Excitement?
If it's a "safe" environment and there's no danger of getting caught, then where's the excitement? You'd get more excitement stealing bubble gum from a 7/11.
It's FREE?
Not if you pay the guarantee subscription price of $249 it isn't. Can anyone say, Pimp my ride?
You're bored?
Find a hobby. Buy a sex toy. Get a dog.
If you start down this road, I've got news for you. You're going to get bored REALLY FAST more often. There is no end to it. Ask anyone who's had a stream of extra-marital affairs:
The first time is the hardest. After that, it gets easier.
And I challenge the founder on his statement because he forgot to finish it:
"Infidelity is a fact of life... for SOME people."
And just because it exists, doesn't mean it's a good idea.
If it was, we would simply do away with marriage as an institution. People would engage in contractual living arrangements that would make each partner feel financially secure and then call it a day, moral turpitude aside.
What he is really saying, is we have to accept it.
That's like saying, "Heroine is here to stay. Deal with it."
As far as I'm concerned, as long as infidelity is grounds for divorce, it's as illegal as smoking crack or shooting heroine. And just because a pusher doesn't fill your syringe and shove a needle in your arm doesn't make him less accountable in the eyes of the law.
We all have free will. No one is disputing that.
But that doesn't mean we're okay with a salesman's approach to promoting behaviour that can have nothing but detrimental consequences on a person's emotional well-being, never mind society's (or the 'pusher's' own karma).
We are ALL interconnected. Make no mistake of that. What one person does, on some level, affects us all.
And just for the record, founder Noel Biderman claims affairs are "bound to save the modern marriage" - yet he is faithful to his wife.
Uh huh.
Next - A devil's advocate approach to the Affair.
